In my article 3 Stages of love , I pointed out that love is a multi-stage process where we experience different emotions at different stages. When it is established that the person is physically desirable, the next important task is to figure out if their personality is compatible with yours. Talking for inordinate amounts of time is a way to gauge the mental characteristics of the person. The problem is: mental characteristics are not easy to assess and take time.
Since assessing personality is a complex task, new lovers are motivated to talk for hours so that they can figure each other out. But why? Going back again to the stages of love , having a crush on someone is only the initial stage of love designed to make people like each other just enough to get them to have sex. The next important stage of love is bringing the two people together long enough so that they can have kids and raise them. Hence, the mind transitions from simply having a crush on someone to also obsessively wanting to know them better.
One way to do this would be spending hours being with them or talking to them. After all, if you have most of their time, the likelihood of them slipping out of your hands diminishes. Sexy questions to ask your partner:. What's your favorite part of my body? What part of my body do you want to explore more? What part of your body do you want me to explore more? What's the hottest memory you have of us?
If you could relive one of our sexual experiences, which would you choose? Which is better: morning sex or sex at night? What does it mean to be good in bed? Fast and hard, or slow and gentle?
Hottest sex position? Sex position that's most likely to make you orgasm? Where is the wildest place you've ever had sex? What would be a really hot place for us to have sex? How would you feel about people watching us have sex? What's your go-to masturbation routine? What kind of porn turns you on?
What's your dirtiest sexual fantasy? What's a very ordinary thing that just really turns you on? How do you feel about being tied up or tying me up? Do you like to be spanked?
Or the idea of spanking me? What would you like to see me dressed in on a special sexual occasion? Funny conversation starters:.
What reality TV show would you be on? What's the worst or weirdest date you've ever been on? What's the weirdest thing that's ever happened to you while having sex with someone? If you were an animal, what kind would you be? Who is your celebrity crush?
Who was your celebrity crush as a teenager? What celebrity would play you in a movie about your life? What would be the title of your autobiography? What is your soul age? Have you ever dated someone who was a bad kisser? Do you have any "moves" when it comes to flirting or dates? What was your first email address? Do you believe in ghosts? Have you ever had any unexplainable or supernatural experiences?
If you were a social media influencer, what would you be known for? When and how did you first discover masturbation? What's something you were weirdly into for a very long period of time? Would you survive a zombie apocalypse?
Questions to get to know your partner better:. Do you want to have kids? Why or why not? What kind of parent do you want to be? How do you feel about religion? What was it like to grow out of your religion?
What's your best habit? Worst habit? What does a perfect marriage look like to you? What would you like your life to be like five years from now? Ten years from now? What do you want to do when you're retired? Tell me about your best friend. What are they like, and why are you best friends? How important is sex to you? By using our site, you agree to our cookie policy.
Cookie Settings. Learn why people trust wikiHow. Download Article Explore this Article methods. Related Articles. Article Summary. Method 1. All rights reserved. This image may not be used by other entities without the express written consent of wikiHow, Inc. Tell your partner what you like. Want to romance your partner on the phone? Compliment them. Tell them you can't stop thinking about something that you like in particular.
Compliment something specific and unique to your partner. Say, "I love talking to you. You always crack me up. Say, "I can't stop thinking about your eyes. Miss you. Say, "You kiss me so well, it's driving me crazy that I can't do it right now. Plan dates that you'll go on. If you can't be together right now, the least you can do is plan what you'll do when you're together in the future.
Talk about dates that you'd like to go on, both exotic and local. Where would you go if you could go anywhere? The beach? A cruise? The mountains? Plan it all out. Plan some everyday dates as well. Talk about how you want to hit up the restaurant around the corner and snuggle in on the couch. Just talk about your lives together.
One good way of ramping up the sexual tension is to talk about what you'll do later tonight. Tell your lover exactly what you plan on doing. In detail. Talk about great times you've had together. Another good way to spend your quality phone time together is to reminisce.
Talk about the great dates you've been on before, or the great things that you've done together. It's always good to remember the early stages of your relationship together. Another great way to build the sexual tension? Reminisce about the things you did a few nights ago. Tell your partner what mind-blowing moves they have, to be sure they get repeated. Fantasize together. Sometimes, the phone can be a great opportunity to talk about things that you might normally find it awkward to talk about in person.
Talk about things you want to explore with your partner, and talk about what turns you on. If you're not sexually active yet, and even if you are, having phone sex can be a new outlet to explore together.
Set regular phone dates. If you have to be apart regularly, it's a good idea to have a regular phone date at a set time, so you can still feel like you've got quality time that you're spending together. Set a half hour or an hour each day so you can catch each other up on your days, talk about the future, and spend a little time talking. If you have to be apart for long periods of time, talk with your partner to find out how much phone conversing you both need.
Do something together on the phone. One great way to spend a phone date is to make a plan to do the same activity while you're talking on the phone together. Plan a fun and easy activity that you can do around the house, and just chat on the speaker phone while you do it. It'll be almost like you're together, even if you're not. Cue up your favorite movie.
Even if you have to be quiet most of the time, it'll be almost like you're together.
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